fantasy // jan. 3, 2017

you only visit me in dreams
I wonder as I lay asleep
how you calm my raging seas
and sweep away the autumn leaves
am I being consumed by all these feelings?
am I falling in too deep?
as I wake up and realize
this is all make-believe


“to be soft is to be powerful”

Ever since I was a kid, people would often say that I had a weak personality. I didn’t exactly know why or even dared to ask back then, but I knew growing up that I was timid, an introvert, and had very low self-esteem. And although I’ve always paid no mind to those comments, sometimes when you get used to being called “the shy girl” or “the quiet one”, you’d start to believe it (which wasn’t actually bad at all). But what I didn’t like about it is that I thought it was a sign of being inferior, unconsciously I was letting myself and other people define me by what I thought was my weakness and fill in my silence with whatever interpretation or understanding they had of me. Up until now I still struggle to remind myself that being “soft” doesn’t exactly mean being “weak”, being “quiet” doesn’t necessarily mean being “scared to talk”, or that being “shy” doesn’t always mean having a “weak personality”. It took me so long to learn how to appreciate being emotional, letting my feelings flow, embracing my personality, and accepting that MY WEAKNESS IS MY STRENGTH.